This next song is from a record breaking show
And it really set a record
It lasted nine previews and one performance
This is true, so I feel it's an important show
And the name of it was 'Another evening with Harry Stoons'Oh, you remembered
Hmm, well, anyway, here's the main song from itCall me a boob
Call me a schlemiel
Call me a brain
With a missing wheelCall me what you will
But nonetheless, I'm still in love with Harold Mingert
And it's not because he has a car
Arnie Fleischer has a car, but a car is just a car
And if Harold didn't have a car to his name
I guess I'd love him just the sameCall me what you will
But nonetheless, I'm still in love with Harold Mingert
And it's not because he has a wealthy family
Arnie Fleischer has a wealthy family but money isn't everything
And if Harold didn't have a dime to his name
I know I'd love him just the sameBut sometimes, I ask myself
Why then, do I then love Harold Mingert
Harold isn't handsome or clever or smart
And I don't find romance and a dance in his heart
The only answers I can think of
Are Harold Mingert's money and Harold Mingert's carCall me what you will
But nonetheless, I'm still in love with Herscher Mingert
Also Arnie Fleischer
Lyrics provided by https://damnlyrics.com/