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Took her off the showroom floor no money down

Near the Chrysler buildin' in the heart of Midtown

Two hundred horse-power under the hood

Junk in the trunk very far from damaged goods

Designer frames with windshields that stay tinted

The most beautiful thing someone invented

Her wrangler had a sticker on the bumper

A sign in case tow trucks tried to dump her

Rear view mirror that of Serena William

Starin' was a crime then the look, kill 'em

Brush less showers and the Brazilian wax

Cash in the glove compartment free from tax

Low mileage on the odometer

Graduate with more degrees than a thermometer

Spark plugs for great conversation

She would focus on the finish line and destination

Steerin' in the right direction

Made sure I wore seat belts, had air bags for protection

In her tank she loved to stash my tool

I kept her full, super-unleaded fuel

She had a room full of skirts and rims

The old ones used to swing off ropes that often hung from limbs

A temp at the Ford modeling agency

Suburban area where the Caucasians be

Her great-grandfather was a Cherokee Indian

Explorer and navigator travelin' then begin

Sharpenin' his arrows on Plymouth Rock

Commander-in-chief who raise cattle on the sellin' of livestock

King of the frontier, rider of thoroughbreds

He was just as sharp as a needle without thread

Legend in truth but known to run the herd

His sons were olds mobiles who drank thunderbird

Land cruisers sittin' on fertile soil

With equipment that ran off expensive oil

Folks braggin' said the horse pulled a Volkswagen

They love Mustang Sally and lollygaggin'

Fished in Lake Tahoe, cooked the barracudas

Hunted impalas with the six-shooters

From a long range with the dog Rover

It was something else to see 'em knock them over

Some got caught in the crossfire

Bunch of rabbits indicatin' these dudes should retire

One was going bald rockin' a sunroof

A gas guzzler and his grill was one tooth

A strong accent, and a beard like Lincoln

Who hated the golf course, but he loved drinkin'

Avenger, used to pick up chicks

Had magnums that were ram tough but thick

He wore blazers where he used to hide the Ruger

For encounters with the jaguars and cougars

A veteran who could salute and sing the anthem

In accord with the plan he was the phantom

He had a fat lady, they called hummer

And um, she needed body work the whole summer

She had a few friends who used to stay in a pound

Abandoned the parkin' lots, and junk yard bound

Regulars in rest areas and truck stops

Cassette players, known to make the tape pop

Gold diggers who on the cream like Wells Fargo

In Vegas, they circle around the Monte Carlo

You know the snakes with the fangs and vipers

Bloodsuckers who [Incomprehensible] juice then piss from diapers

Met the Cavaliers at the Outback steakhouse

Chicken cutlets supreme just for takeout

One of them was forced to live in Astoria

'Cause at the auction, they had crowned Victoria

Since then her friends charged her battery

Had her runnin' off with the sweets of flattery

She kept a loud muffler, couldn't trust her

Police used to always pull over this duster

A pothead who some called a fire bird

A foul mouth, who could have used wiser words

Her man used to hustle and ran a crack corner

So insecure he kept Lojack on her

Creepin' with his visors low, high-beamin'

Temper would accelerate, private eye schemin'

He would check her consoles for rubbers

She would pass the inspection with flyin' colors

She would turn left if he said right

On her cycle, he would often run red lights

His voiced echoed as she dodged the convo

Pro tools

Her previous owner, all he did was bone her

Some drove her crazy, she was just a loner

He had her leakin' transmission fluids

Said it was an accident, didn't mean to do it

No insurance with her grill decayed

She sobbed uncontrollably, still stayed

Another total eclipse so the heart

Like the freezin' weather that never gave her a start

Plus he had a sidekick in his garage

If he needed a boost, she would give him a charge

He was sentenced for runnin' an escort service

Escaped from prison but made a few nervous

His baby mother [Incomprehensible] BMW

Number one on the list, so he brought trouble to

She done everythin' to gain her liberty

Tried to be outty, but went into delivery

Moved to Aspen, survived a avalanche

A different element, inside a fatter ranch

Far away, when she changed the pattern

The distance was like from Mercury to Saturn

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