There's someone waiting
in the ballroom
in the ballroom
And they're preparing
to meet with their doom
in the ballroom
Yah! Yah! Yah!
There's a body
lying in the study
in the study
And its clothes
are tattered and bloody
In the study
Yah! Yah! Yah!
I've got something
cooking in my kitchen
in my kitchen
in the kitchen
But you don't want to know
quite what's in the kitchen
Yah! Yah! Yah!
I look to my friend
and I see in his eyes
I mustn't falter
I mustn't falter
Changing the evidence
isn't so wise
The facts don't alter
The facts don't alter
All of this murder
gives me palpitations
Monsters and ghoulies
and manifestations
I can't believe this
is really happening to me
Yah! Yah! Yah!
And now I turn to Uncle Jo
He rolls the dice 'cos it's his go
He lifts his hand to scratch his chin
'cos when he plays, he plays to win
Now let's turn to cousin Sarah
I pull a face to try and scare her
To Uncle Jo she shows her cards
He says piss off! Let's play charades
And now I see across the table
The grinning face of Auntie Mabel
I look at her my knees grow weak
Her mouth trembles
she starts to speak
It was Miss Scarlet
in the ballroom
And she was using
(what was she using?)
The la la la la la
la la la la
Lead piping
It was the
la la la la la
la la la la
Lead piping
Lyrics Submitted by Richard Gagnon