Momma told me, boy, you best behave
'Cause Santa keeps a list of all his faves
And if you don't shape up, you ain't gettin' squat
But the devil on my shoulder's gettin' hotHotter than heaven, cool outta sight
If I'm gonna do wrong, I'm gonna do it rightSo he took me for a ride in his Cadillac
Stolen from a kleptomaniac at a horse race track
I said, sir, it's Christmas Eve, I should be home in bed
Instead, he said, you merry gentle men always bet on redThe duke of deception, malice and spite
If I'm gonna do wrong, I'm gonna do it rightWhen you're done, you're really done
We look back and say, hey, that was fun
When all you wanted was a BB gun
Santa Claus never did comeWhen you're done, you're really done
We look back and say, hey, that was funSo he took me for a ride in his big ol' sleigh
We flew around the world in just one day, Johnny Mathis sang
I said, sir, what you got for me in that sled?
Instead, he said, boy, you been bettin' on a darker shade of redHotter than heaven, cool outta sight
Duke of deception, malice and spiteJohnny is singin', remember tonight
If you gotta do wrong, you better do it right