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Christmas Time In California

Advisory - the following lyrics contain explicit language:

Well, the snow ain't falling down

Nobody bundled head to feet

There's no children sledding snowball

Frickin' fighting in the streetThere ain't no Christmas carolers singing

Jolly winter songs

It's just spray-tanned people

Out sunbathing in their thongsNobody with chestnut roasting

No snowmen being made

You can pray for some hot cocoa

All you'll get is lemonadeThere ain't no snowflakes falling

'Cause it's 85 degrees

When it drops way down to 70

People think they're gonna freeze

And you're sweating half to death

As you hang lights in the palm treesIt's Christmas time in California

Put on your sunscreen

Christmas time in California

Toasty, warm and greenTake a sleigh ride to the beach

Do snow angels in the sand

'Cause it's Christmas Time in CaliforniaYou decorate your lawn

With surfin' Santas made of lights

You put the fake snow on the rooftop

And scratch mosquito bitesYou cruise in your convertible

Drive through the Taco Bell

The lot next door has million dollar

Christmas trees to sell

And you buy a dried-up Douglas-fir

Wnd wonder, "What the hell?"It's Christmas time in California

Put on your sunscreen

Christmas time in California

Toasty, warm and greenTake a sleigh ride to the beach

Do snow angels in the sand

'Cause it's Christmas time in CaliforniaI don't wanna mow the lawn right now

I wanna shovel snow

I don't wanna any more damn sunshine

I want 29 belowI don't wanna wear a tank top

'Cause my snow suit can't be beat

I don't want these stupid flip flops

I want moon boots on my feetI don't wanna go out swimming

I'd rather be on skis

I don't wanna be all toasty warm

I'd rather frickin' freezeAnd if I spend another minute

On the stupid 405

I will drive my damn car off a cliff

And burn my ass aliveMaybe I should move away

But the rest of the year is pretty okay

So I'll suffer through another holidayIt's Christmas time in California

Put on your sunscreen

Christmas time in California

Toasty, warm and greenTake a sleigh ride to the beach

Do snow angels in the sand

'Cause it's Christmas time in California

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