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Ding Dong

My cat died and I quickly poured myself some gin

Did she die from old age or was it for my sins?

God I loved her oh so much, miss her little kitty touch

Does she miss me, does she care? Oh I miss her kitty stare

Do you have a little time, would you like to ease my mind?

Talk for hours and never stop, chop your head off

Be a lighter person, brighter person, nicer

But you've heard it all beforeSo ding dong, there's the doorbell

Hello man in white

He's gonna make you all well

Get you through the night

But hey now

You don't feel better

As you take your fresh bromide

Maybe this man of letters liedLet me tell you 'bout a dream, I had the other night

You were in it boy, you sure gave me a super fright

I was walking down the street, downtown by the D.M.V.

You popped out behind a door, it was odd you were on all fours

Do you have some time to spare, you were barking at a bear

It said, "Hey you'd better stop, chop your head off

Be a lighter person, brighter person, nicer"

But you've heard it all beforeSo ding dong, there's the doorbell

Hello man in red

He's gonna make you all well

Get you into bed

But hey now

You don't feel better

As you wake and slowly rise

Maybe this smooth jet-setter liedStick around one minute more, I'm smarter than you think

Do I sound like an old bore, oh man it's just the drink

I didn't always hit the gin, there were times when I fit in

They'll never know how much I tried, did I tell you my cat died?

Do you have a little time, would you like to feel sublime?

Run away and never stop, chop your head off

Be a lighter person, brighter person, nicer

But you've heard it all beforeSo ding dong, there's the doorbell

Hello man in black

He's gonna make you all well

There's no goin' back

But hey now you don't feel better

As you drift off in the tide

Maybe this Jack the Ripper lied

And you died

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