I am your neighbor, I seem most respectable
But underneath I'm an iniquitous toad
So many dreadful mishaps have befallen you
Down at the end of your road
And I live down the end of your road
I'm working on ways to remove you from paradise
From your striped lawn and your new swimming pool
I place broken bottles in your geraniums
Sabotage your gardening tools
And I live down the end of your road
By day I am a real estate gentleman
I deal in fine properties, cheap at the price
After dark, I plan my most devious practices
Which you might think are not very nice
Designing a system to reverse your plumbing
Welling up, as you sit on your private throne
Will come up all kinds of vile and despicable nasties
You would rather not have in your home
And I live down the end of your road
Dispensed loathsome creatures in your drawing room
Sent doggy poo, poos in your morning mail
Rat's heads and lark's wings should set your tums turning
And your houses will soon be for sale
And I live down the end of your road
I live down the end of your road