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Everyday Normal Guy

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

Nothing special about me motherfucker

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

When I go to the clubs I wait in line motherfucker

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

I got 600 dollars in the bank motherfucker

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

And my sexual perfomances are averageI work at customer service at a phone company

I make 12 bucks an hour but that's all I need

I live in a small apartment on a quiet street

I don't go out much, I like to watch TVI can't afford a car, I use public transportation

I don't mind, I read till I reach my destination

Sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book

The amount of money I save, this shit is off the hookAnd I'm not very good with the women

I'm a pretty sharp person and I'm average looking

Last time I had sex was in 2003

And I'm ashamed to admit it, but it wasn't freeI'm just a regular everyday normal guy

I get nervous in social situations motherfucker

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

I get constipated once a month motherfucker

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

And I make pretty good spaghetti sauce motherfucker

I'm just a regular everyday normal guy

And I get scared when I go see the dentistI'm the Pauly Shore of everyday life

Easily forgettable, and I'm not very liked

I have an According to Jim personality

I'm as entertaining as a fucking STDIf you want to mess with me, I think you probably can

Because I'm not confident, and I'm weak for a man

I'll just roll up in a ball when you kick me in the back

Yeah honestly, I probably won't fight backAnd I don't have many friends that would back me up

My friend Steve would, but he doesn't look very tough

"You want some of this, bitch?"If you rarely get laid put your hands up

If you're not well paid put your hands up

If you got a pet cat put your hands up

And if you have a bad back put your hands up" I hurt my back two summers ago moving a fridge, and ever since then, it's just not the same... you know it... it gets.. it gets pretty sore"I am just a regular everyday normal guy

My parents are really nice people moterfucker

I am just a regular everyday normal guy

I am somewhat afraid of heights motherfucker

I am just a regular everyday normal guy

I like the show Grey's Anatomy motherfucker

I am just a regular everyday normal guy

And I am pretty good at making paper planes

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