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Frank's Wild Years

Well, Frank settled down in the Valley

And he hung his wild years on a nail that he drove through his wife's forehead

He sold used office furniture out there on San Fernando Road

And assumed a thirty thousand dollar loan at fifteen and a quarter percent

And put a down payment on a little two bedroom place

His wife was a spent piece of used jet trash

Made good bloody Marys, kept her mouth shut most of the time

Had a little Chihuahua named Carlos

That had some kind of skin disease and was totally blind

They had a thoroughly modern kitchen, self-cleaning oven, the whole bit

Frank drove a little sedan, yhey were so happy

One night Frank was on his way home from work, stopped at the liquor store

Picked up a couple of Mickey's Big Mouths

Drank 'em in the car on his way to the Shell station

Got a gallon of gas in a can

Drove home, doused everything in the house, torched it

Parked across the street laughing, watching it burn

All Halloween-orange and chimney-red

Then Frank put on a top forty station

Got on the Hollywood Freeway, headed north

Never could stand that dog

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