The world today seems absolutely crackers
With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high
There's fools and idiots sittin' on the trigger
It's depressing and it's senseless, and that's whyI like Chinese, I like Chinese
They only come up to your knees
Yet they're always friendly, and they're ready to pleaseI like Chinese, I like Chinese
There's nine hundred million of them in the world today
You'd better learn to like them, that's what I sayI like Chinese, I like Chinese
They come from a long way overseas
But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to pleaseI like Chinese food, the waiters never are rude
Think of the many things they've done to impress
There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching, and chessSo I like Chinese, I like Chinese
I like their tiny little trees
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin and yang-eseI like Chinese thought, the wisdom that Confucius taught
If Darwin is anything to shout about
The Chinese will survive us all without any doubtSo, I like Chinese, I like Chinese
They only come up to your knees
Yet they're wise and they're witty and they're ready to please
All togetherWo ai zhongguo ren, wo ai zhongguo ren
Wo ai zhongguo ren
Ni hao ma; ni hao ma; ni hao ma; zaijienI like Chinese, I like Chinese
Their food is guaranteed to please
A fourteen, a seven, a nine and lycheesI like Chinese, I like Chinese
I like their tiny little trees
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin and yang-eseI like Chinese, I like Chinese
They only come up to your knees