You keep your jealousy and your snide remarks to yourself
You know that I'm not seeing anybody else
You just keep your ear down to the ground
Yell your head off if you hear a soundAnd here's a whistle and a badge and a phone
You can arrest me if I'm not at home
And if I don't keep my word
I swear I'll keep awayHere's some books and a puzzle by Escher
Here's Shakespeare's "Measure For Measure"
Here's a balloon, a rubber band and a bag
Why don't you blow them up if you think you've been had?Here's a castle, a paper dragon and a moat
An earring, a toothbrush and a cloak
And if I don't keep my word
I swear I'll keep awayI swear I'll keep away from all we've ever done
I'll keep away the good times and I'll keep away the fun
I swear I'll join the army or maybe the marines
I'll start to wear designer suits and put away my jeansI swear that I'll keep away from all my old-time friends
I'll throw away my records I'll try to make amends
I swear I'll give up gambling and playing with the rent
I'll give up food and drinking I'll give up a life ill-spentHere's a yardstick you can measure me by
Here's a coupon maybe there's something you want to buy
Here's a band aid in case you cut your feet
Here's a rubber mallet you can use on your front teethHere's a gun no one uses anymore
And a bracelet made of some inexpensive ore
And if I don't keep my word
You won't see me anymoreI swear I'll keep away, from dignity and pride
I'll keep away from abstracts, I'll keep it all inside
Well, I'll just wrap me up in butter and melt me on a shelf
I'll fry in my own juices an' I'll become somebody elseWell, I'll just swear to keep away from everything that's good
I'll lie down in a gutter where I really should
I swear I'll light a candle to every modern foe
I swear I'll close the book on this and not see you anymore
'Cause I just got to get away