Advisory - the following lyrics contain explicit language:
[Verse 1]
I'm feeling numb
Thinking of changing my name to Crystal Meth
Playing this game
Holding my mic like a pistol
Aiming at death
But I love nobody
Alone in this world that's how I came in it
But shit could flash and reverse the same in a minute
I don't even love life no more
My niggas, I just live it
And I don't love love
All the hurting is infinite
I cry myself to sleep sometimes
Wept a gallon of tears
From malice, divorced mates to lost peers
Drowning in a haze of smoke and glasses that never ran empty
Bottles of So-Co
Cheap vodka and twenty; twenty
Spending my pennies for thoughts
On quarts of henneything
Got none pain like the movie have plenty
Like a shotgun, double barrel fully loaded ready to blow
I wanna turn around and aim at myself
Been failing my health
I hardly even eat no more
My lunch is munchies from the corner store
Tropical fantasy
Me and my family
Me and my niggas used to be tight
And now we see each other on the block with no pounds
And keep it moving you gotta move on
I know I'm doing it right
I'm still living hustling life, still here[Hook]
For all my niggas that smoke a pack a day
For all my niggas hold the bottle drink the pain away
What type of life is this
For all my niggas that getting the cash
And all my niggas that chill on the av
Lets keep living
For all my niggas drink the pain away
For all my niggas smoke a pack of Newports a day
What type of life is this
For all my niggas that getting the cash
And all my niggas that chill on the av
Lets keep living[Verse 2]
Grew up as a child of an alcoholic
Sister to schizophrenic
And already inherited one and they both are genetic
When sun falls I gets no sleep
Nights are filled with party and bullshit
Bacardi and full clips
Just to deal with it
Got a full heart
But don't feel with it no more
I have fury of woman who's scorned
Just live my life like the X-Files and trust nobody
Forgetting everyone
Now I'm just forgetting the money
Funny how shit can change and switch up fragile to rip on you
Spent too much of my young life just trying to stitch shit up
I'm living day-by-day now
Every step is play by play hand to mouth
I'm just trying to make the moments count
Eyes weak stressing my soul
Chest roll from a heavy smoking addict since nine
A nicotine addict
Devoted at it but still
I need some kinda relief
I quit the trees at least
I'm learning, niggas but I'm slow at it
Always give my motherfuckers the benefit of the doubt
But it seems that everybody is just out for self
I used to love her
But now I gotta make her work for my wealth
I gotta eat y'all[Hook][Verse 3]
From rapping to nicotine
Niggas will clapping
And niggas who fiend
From some shit I never seen to everything I been through
It's like, loosing the love of your life twice in the same night
Being deaf for years, gained your hearing and loosing your sight
Trying to shine but just getting eclipse
I'm just tryin to find the perfect words to fall from my lips
Thinking too hard about what shit has fallen
Mainly the chips
Hoping by the next time installment that I'm not attempting to slit wrists
Got nothing down
I work my way up from the bottom to the
Top of the ladder
Claim what's rightfully mine
Working against time
It's been too long
And I haven't had a chance to leave y'all yet
I apologize
Getting older, wiser
Seen the picture painted
My destiny faded for this
And not for easy times
I put my heart in these rhymes for always
Love it or, leave it or ready to die
Yeah I'm ready, come on