Odd Job Man

I give part time help

I'm the odd job man

I can't do what I want

So I do what I canAnd I'll tell you now

So that you will understand

You get just what you pay for

From the odd job manOne day this dude drives in the station

And I slide out to the pump

And he says, " I need some odd jobs done

Can you get off from this dump?"Well, I can always use some extra bread

So I nod and take the job

When he says, "Clean up before you come

I do not hire slobs "Now you can see I'm not no fancy pants

But everyone has pride

And especially since this lovely lady's

Sittin' by his sideStill something keeps my trap shut

And I nod again, " Alright "

And he gooses his Mercedes

And he squeals off in the nightI give part time help

I'm the odd job man

I can't do what I want

So I do what I canAnd I'll tell you now

So that you will understand

You get just what you pay for

From the odd job manWell, I find his place next morning

It's more a palace than a pad

And it kind of makes my pick-up truck

Start looking pretty badBut the same lady swings the door back

And before one word is said

She leads me to his trophy room

Where he sits with his stuffed headsHe's got this list of jobs for me to do

While he's out of town

And he says, "I'm too damn busy boy

The way I move around"Well, I start to figure prices when he says

"It's time you learned

When you're dealing with a gentleman

You get just what you earn"I give part time help

I'm the odd job man

I can't do what I want

So I do what I canAnd I'll tell you now

So that you will understand

You get just what you pay for

From the odd job manI set to work that weekend

And I'm fixin' up some stairs

When I feel that someone's watching me

And I see she's standing thereAnd she says, "I like to watch you work

You have such supple hands"

She says, "Can I help you?"

And I say, "Baby you can"Well, she looks me in the eyes, boys

I admit I looked a little lower

That's when she starts breathing faster

And I start working slowerYou see when you have a helper

With her attitude and grace

You start puttin' lots of extra hours

Workin' 'round the placeI give part time help

I'm the odd job man

I can't do what I want

So I do what I canAnd I'll tell you now

So that you will understand

You get just what you pay for

From the odd job manWell, a month had too soon come and gone

With my odd jobs all done

When who should pull up to the pump

But the long-lost prodigal sonAnd he says, "Here's a hundred dollars, boy"

Pulls the bill off from his wad

And he starts to hand it over

Like a gift come straight from GodI say, "That's just a buck an hour sir"

He says, "That's what I pay for jerks"

Now I admit that almost blew my cool

But I staggered back to workYou see most times when it's said and done

There's justice to this life

'Cause what that man had done to me

I'd done to his wifeI give part time help

I'm the odd job man

I can't do what I want

So I do what I canAnd I'll tell you now

So that you will understand

You get just what you pay for

From the odd job man