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Romance Is Boring

Darling, I'm with St. Bernards

And we're scouring the Alps and the Andes

And if they die then it is on my head

They follow paw prints in the snow to my throne to my bedYou're pouting in your sleep, I'm waking still yawning

We're proving to each other that romance is boring

Still there are things I could do if I was half prepared to

Prove to each other that romance is boringStart as you mean to continue

Complacent and self-involved

You're trying not to be nervous

If you were trying at allI will wake, I will bake phallic cake

Take your diffidence, make it my clubhouse

But my strength's within lies, ventricle cauterized

It's the way of living that I espouseYou're pouting in your sleep, I'm waking still yawning

We're proving to each other that romance is boring

Still there are things I could do if I was half prepared to

Prove to each other that romance is boringWe are two ships that pass in the night

You and I, we are nothing alike

I am a pleasure cruise, you a direct to trawl

Return less empty, nothing at allYou're pouting in your sleep, I'm waking still yawning

We're proving to each other that romance is boring

Still there are things I could do if I was half prepared to

Prove to each other that romance is boring

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