I used to watch Quantum Leap every night with my girlfriend
Al and Sam, they leaped through time and it felt like they were my best friends
Ziggy said there's a 98 percent chance of a broken heart
Scott Bakula, never played Dracula
Laid down the smackula on the bad guys
Well he was honest and sharing and loving and caring
The kind of guy who would always do the right thing
Clever and handsome and so damn sensitive
And I'm not...Scott
He was smart enough to tame the fire in that self-empowered Murphy Brown chick
I even watched Lord of Illusions even though I thought the movie kind of sucked
Ziggy said there's a 98 percent chance that the ending's sad
Scott Bakula, never smoked crackula
Played quarterbackula in Necessary Roughness
Well he was honest and sharing and loving and caring
The kind of guy who would always do the right thing
Clever and handsome and so frickin' sensitive
And I'm not...Scott
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not Scott
He's nice enough to play a gay guy, yeah he's cool enough to star in sci-fi
Well he's man enough to helm a starship
and I'm the type of guy who would feel left a bone chip (???)
Ziggy says there's a 98 percent chance that I'm a prick
Scott Bakula, never played Blackula
Played quarterbackula in Nexessary Roughness
Well he was honest and sharing and loving and caring
The kind of guy who would always do the right thing
Clever and handsome and so frickin' sensitive
And I'm not, and I'll never be Scott Bakula
I'll never be Scott Bakula
I'll never be Scott Bakula
I'll never be Scott Bakula
No one can love you like Scott Bakula can love you
I'll never be Scott Bakula
He possesses all the traits that I'm sorely lacking
Sometimes I just wanna punch him in the sackula
You know, 'cause I'm not...
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Lyrics submitted by Jim.