Hildy: Wish I had one of them horses that's on a stick, put it between your legs...jump up and down with it, those are fun!
Billy B: Hildy!
Hildy: Yeah, Billy B?
Billy B: I was parucing the interweb the other day in the search new and interesting forms of pornography, and I came across something very interesting that jugs oppose on aunts mama's missionary position on alcohol.
Hildy: Oh, she didn't like alcohol....?
Billy B: No, she did not, but this here fact kind of undermines that position, which...uh...I assume is a bad position.
The key figure in her mythology, a mr Jesus, appearantly used to turn water into wine.
Hildy: No shit?!
Billy B: Yes, and I have an idea; I'm looking around the room here I see a lot of people with aquaphena....I'm thinking if we find Jesus and get him down here, we can take that aquaphena and turn it into wine, take this punk rock party up a notch, what do ya say?
Hildy: I say hey Jesus!!!
And behold there was an angel
And she took me by the hand
led me deep into the chamber
mother’s belly underground.
I found comfort in this darkness.
As a child in the womb
Unafraid my eyes were open
Silent angel filled the room
Then mr Jesus
(Hey Jesus!!)
Saved our party
(Hey Jesus!!)
With his wine
(Hey Jesus!!)
It's the legend of the sour grapes!
She bade me to peer thru yonder portal
to heaven just before the sun.
And behold the morning angel.
Whispering follow me now, son
With Her light as through a finger
Pointing to the yonder wall
Traced a path of 5 directions
And behold the holy Star.
Then mr Jesus
(Hey Jesus!!)
Saved our party
(Hey Jesus!!)
With his wine
(Hey Jesus!!)
It's the legend of the sour grapes!
Hildy: OK now, Billy B, this Jesus...he sounds awful talented?
Billy B: VERY!
Hildy:Now...do you think..you know how to make that spinach dip and put it in a sour bread bowl. Now, do you think he can take my spinach dip and turn it into something maybe a little bit more useful like...I dunno...cocaine?
Billy B: I believe he can, see? I was cruising his wikipedia file and as it turns out that mr Jesus was a very talented fella. He could not only clear up eczema, work..uh..work on your..your acne, fix retards, and get this: master of watersports. So I dont think that much of a stretch.
He can not only turn your awful spinach dip into cocaine, I think we can skip right over the wine. Let's take that water and turn it into tequila
Hildy: Fuckin A, Jesus!! He's amazing!!
Jesus!
(Hey Jesus!!)
Saved our party
(Hey Jesus!!)
With his wine
(Hey Jesus!!)
And cocaine
(Oh Jesus!!)
It's the legend of the sour
legend of the sour
legend of the sour grapes!
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Lyrics submitted by kim salabim.