The bananas lookin brown except for where I left that sticker
And the spice rack is empty cept for cinnamon, salt and pepper
The tea in the jar is ten years old, Lemon Lint and Chamomold
And the coffeepot is stickin to the maker,
Which is stickin to the counter
Soup-can sentinels guard the pre-colonial cupboard
With hibernating honey, tins of tuna and cardboard crackers
And now the brand new honey with the angel face
Wants to come over and see my place
And chewin on a grape slash raisin I mull it over
But I know it would kill the deal
If she saw my Achilles heelTelltale Kitchen
If you want her to stay you best keep her away
Telltale kitchen
Telltale kitchen
The microwave is broken
The smoke detectors smokin
Telltale kitchenOver in the fridge the mustard, catsup, mayonnaise and butter
Have formed an uncanny resemblance to each other
And the prehistoric bagels in the bag in the back
Are hiding from the dairy on the death row rack
As the fish flavored iceberg spawns upstream in the freezer
You would think that the sink wouldnt stink
''cause it looks like its hardly been used
But who knows what grows in the disposal
After years of beers half drunk get dumped
And no-ones fixin the water pumpTelltale Kitchen
If you want her to stay you best keep her away
Telltale Kitchen
Telltale Kitchen
If you are what you eat
Im maggoty meat
Telltale KitchenThe blenders on a bender fermenting the remainder
Of a porridge of origin too ancient to remember
But mercifully the rubber cap is permanently stuck there
So the substrate self-perpetuates ad-nauseinfinitum
My ego is an ego sequestered in the freezer
Like an Eskimo they leggo for bein a grumpy geezer
And the trough-full of drosophila assaulting the falafel
Make the Amityville horde look like a hospital wardTelltale kitchen
If you want her to stay you best keep her away
Telltale kitchen
Telltale kitchen
The garbage had grown
A bouquet of its own
Telltale kitchen
Songwriters
ERIC LEIGH SCHWARTZPublished by
Lyrics © ST MUSIC LLC.