Never been near a university
Never took a paper or a learned degreeAnd some of your friends think that's stupid of me
But it's nothing that I care aboutWell, I don't know how to tell the weight of the sun
And of mathematics well, I want none
And I may be the mayor of simpleton
But I know one thing and that's I love youWhen their logic grows cold and all thinking gets done
You'll be warm in the arms of the mayor of simpletonI can't have been there when brains were handed round
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton
Or get past the cover of your books profound
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpletonAnd some of your friends thinks it's really unsound
That you're ever seen talking to meWell, I don't know how to write a big hit song
And all crossword puzzles, well I just shun
And I may be the mayor of simpleton
But I know one thing and that's I love youI'm not proud of the fact that I never learned much
Just feel I should say, what you get is all real
I can't put on an act, it takes brains to do that anyway
And anywayAnd I can't unravel riddles problems and puns
How the home computer has me on the run
And I may be the mayor of simpleton
But I know one thing and that's I love you, I love youIf depth of feeling is a currency
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton
Then I'm the man who grew the money tree
No change of office and no hope of getting oneSome of your friends are too brainy to see
That they're paupers and that's how they'll stayWell, I don't know how many pounds make up a ton
Of all the Nobel prizes that I've never won
And I may be the mayor of simpleton
But I know one thing and that's I love you, I love youWhen all logic grows cold and all thinking gets done
You'll be warm in the arms of the mayor of simpleton
You'll be warm in the arms of the mayor of simpleton
You'll be warm in the arms of the mayorPlease be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton
Please be upstanding for the mayor of simpleton