Could make a dress
A robe fit for a prince
I could clothe a continent
But I can't sew a stitchI can paint my face
And stand very, very still
It's not very practical
But it still pays the billsI can't change my name
But I could be your type
I can dance and win at games
Like backgammon and lifeI used to be the smart one
Sharp as a tack
Funny how that skipping years ahead
Has held me backI used to be the bright one
Top in my class
Funny what they give you when you
Just learn how to askI can write a song
But I cant sing in key
I can play piano
But I never learned to readI can't trap a mouse
But I can pet a cat
No I'm really serious
I'm really very good at thatI can't fix a car
But I can fix a flat
I could fix a lot of things
But I'd rather not get into thatI used to be the bright one
Smart as a whip
Funny how you slip so far when
Teachers don't keep track of itI used to be the tight one
The perfect fit
Funny how those compliments can
Make you feel so full of itI can shuffle, cut and deal
But I can't draw a hand
I can't draw a lot of things
I hope you understandI'm not exceptionally shy
But I've never had a man
That I could look straight in the eye
And tell my secret plansI can take a vow
And I can wear a ring
And I can make you promises but
They won't mean a thingCan't you do it for me?
I'll pay you well
Fuck, I'll pay you anything
If you could end thisCan't you just fix it for me?
It's gone berserk
Fuck, I'll give you anything
If you can make the damn thing workCan't you just fix it for me?
I'll pay you well
Fuck, I'll pay you anything
If you can end thisHello, I love you
Will you tell me your name?
Hello, I'm good for nothing
Will you love me just the same?