When I Go Down

I'll tell you flat out it hurts so much to think of this

So from my thoughts I will exclude

The very thing that I hate more than everything is

The way I'm powerless to dictate my own moodsI've thrown away so many things

That could've been much more

And I just pray my problems go

Away if they're ignored

But that's not the way it works

No that's not the way it worksWhen I go down, I go down hard

And I take everything I've learned

And teach myself some disregard

When I go down, it hurts to hit the bottom

And of the things that got me there

I think, if only I had fought themIf and when I can

Clear myself of this clouded mind

I'll watch myself settle down into a place where

Peace can search me out and find

That I'm so ready to be foundI've thrown away the hope I had in friendships

I've thrown away so many things

That could have been much more

I've thrown away the secret to find an end to this

And I just pray my problems go away if they're ignored

But that's not the way it works

No that's not the way it worksWhen I go down, I go down hard

And I take everything I've learned

And teach myself some disregard

When I go down, it hurts to hit the bottom

And of the things that got me there

I think, if only I had fought themAny control I thought I had

Just slips right through my hands

While my ever-present conscience

Shakes its head and reprimands me

Reprimands meThen and there I confess

I'll blame all this on my selfishness

Yet You love me and that consumes me

And I'll stand up again

And do so willinglyYou give me hope, and hope it gives me life

You touch my heavy heart

And when You do You make it light

As I exhale I hear Your voice

And I answer You, though I hardly make a noiseAnd from my lips the words I choose to say

Seem pathetic, but it's fallen man's praise

Because I love You, oh God, I love YouAnd life is now worth living

If only because of You

And when they say that I'm dead and gone

It won't be further from the truthWhen I go down I lift my eyes to You

I won't look very far 'cause You'll be there

With open arms to lift me up again

To life me up again