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Alcohol or Comedy - Bif Naked



     
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Alcohol or Comedy Lyrics


My life was comedy, quitting drinking was the easiest thing I've ever done, I have never looked back. I can not simply understand why the hell I waited so longunmanageable life! What an embarrassment, what a weakness, what a ultimate lack of self-discipline, what a loser. My parents never drank or smoked; I put them through hell, poor parents. I was such an ungrateful disrespectful, selfish, hormonal little teenager, with a mouthy attitude, and sense of humor quite unlike my sisters. I decided I dint need to continue attending church with my parents; I was searching for my individuality. What an idiot, I wanted attention, I wanted everyone to think I was funny, I wanted everyone to like me, I hated myself. I was called bug eyes, I was called fish lips, and I was called modern dairies. The grade 9 gurls hated me they harassed me and beat me up. I wonder how those gurls are now. I wonder if they are living exciting fulfilling loving lives, I wonder if there happy and healthy. Me and my best friend Karime had every line of every Eddie Murphy movie down.goo la goo goo, you could smell it, im a karate man! Karate man bruise on the inside so they don't show their weaknessbanana in the tail pipe..bah boola bah boola bah boola bu ha ha bah boola bah boola bah boola ha! You name it I wanted to be Eddie Murphy or Robin Williams. I wanted to be them I still am enraptured with comedians, they must always be carefree and laughing and playing jokes, and having fun, except for maybe Richard Lewis, he always says he cant get a date, bet ya he can, bet ya hes really ticklish. Like metickled with life, tickled pink, pink ladies, black Russians, iron butterflies, Quitting drinking was the easiest thing I ever done, Quitting my comedic dreams was hardI can never look back on either.

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Bif Naked (born Beth Torbert on June 17, 1971) is a popular Canadian rock artist who's been active since 1994. She was born in New Delhi, India, spent most of her formative years in Harare, Zimbabwe and Tammisaari, Finland only to be adopted in late adolescence by American missionaries in Papua Nuova Guinea; they eventually settled in Winnipeg, Canada. She graduated from John Taylor Collegiate and studied theatre at the University of Winnipeg. She had a cameo in the zombie horror film The House of the Dead which was filmed near her home in Vancouver, British Columbia. A noted poet, she has also released a spoken word album. She is heavily tattooed, getting her first when she was 16 of an Egyptian eye. Her tattoos now include a symbol of the Tao, Japanese writing, Buddhist poetry and images (such as the Bodhisattva), and Hindu imagery.

Bif has always been frank about her bisexuality, and the lyrics of her autobiographical songs detail her attractions to and relationships with both men and women. She is also a strict raw food vegan for health (as opposed to ethical or religious) reasons. She also identifies as straight edge.

TV Appearances:
Bif Naked was featured on the Buffy the Vampire Slayer soundtrack during the fourth season with their song 'Lucky'. They were actually shown on the show playing at one of UC Sunnydale's fraternity houses, with their song 'Moment of Weakness', but 'Lucky' was used as a play over. Bif also played a small role in an episode of L-Word (in season 3) as a character named "Cynthia".

She voiced the character Zoe Payne in the SSX (Snowboard Supercross) videogame series.

Awards & Recognition:
* Bif was in the top 10 sexiest women for “TV Week”
* at Much Music she was selected "Hottest Female with Tattoos”
* CFOX Vancouver recently named Bif the hottest celebrity, saying it was a landslide win
* XFM named her the sexiest female in music after an open polling on their radio.

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Bif Naked