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Chinese Desserts - Jim Gaffigan



     
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Chinese Desserts Lyrics


First things first rest in peace Uncle Phil, for real
You the only father that I ever knew
I get my bitch pregnant I'ma be a better you
Prophesies that I made way back in the Ville, fulfilled
Listen even back when we was broke my team ill
Martin Luther King would have been on Dreamville
Talk to a nigga
One time for my LA sisters
One time for my LA hoes
Lame niggas can't tell the difference
One time for a nigga who know
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her

She don't wanna be saved
No role models and I'm here right now
No role models to speak of
Searchin' through my memory, my memory, I couldn't find one
Last night I was gettin' my feet rubbed
By the baddest bitch, not Trina, but I swear to God
This bitch will make you call your girl up and tell her "Hey, what's good?
"Sorry I'm never comin' home I'ma stay for good"
Then hang the phone up, and proceed to lay the wood
I came fast like 9-1-1 in white neighborhoods
Ain't got no shame bout it
She think I'm spoiled and I'm rich cause I can have any bitch
I got defensive and said "Nah, I was the same without it"
But then I thought back, back to a better me
Before I was a B-list celebrity
Before I started callin' bitches "bitches" so heavily
Back when you could get a platinum plaque without no melody
You wasn't sweatin' me
One time for my LA sisters
One time for my LA hoes
Lame niggas can't tell the difference
One time for a nigga who know
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
I want a real love, dark skinned and Aunt Viv love
That Jada and that Will love
That leave a toothbrush at your crib love
And you ain't gotta wonder whether that's your kid love
Nigga I don't want no bitch from reality shows
Out of touch with reality hoes
Out in Hollywood bringin' back 5 or 6 hoes
Fuck em' then we kick em' to the door
Nigga you know how it go
She deserved that, she a bird, it's a bird trap
You think if I didn't rap she would flirt back
Takin' off her skirt, let her wear my shirt before she leave
I'ma need my shirt back, nigga you know how it go
One time for my LA sisters
One time for my LA hoes
Lame niggas can't tell the difference
One time for a nigga who know
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas - probably in Tennessee
that says fool me once, shame on - shame on you. If you fool me we can't get fooled
again
Fool me one time shame on you
Fool me twice, can't put the blame on you
Fool me three times, fuck the peace signs
Load the chopper, let it rain on you
My only regret was too young for Lisa Bonet
My only regret was too young for Nia Long
Now all I'm left with is hoes from reality shows
Hand her a script the bitch probably couldn't read along
My only regret was too young for Sade Adu
My only regret could never take Aaliyah home
Now all I'm left with is hoes up in Greystone
With the stale face cause they know it's they song
She shallow but the pussy deep (she shallow, she shallow)
She shallow but the pussy deep (she shallow, she shallow)
She shallow but the pussy deep (she shallow, she shallow)
She shallow but the pussy deep (she shallow, she shallow)
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Don't save her
She don't wanna be saved
Song Discussions is protected by U.S. Patent 9401941. Other patents pending.

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Jim Gaffigan (born July 7, 1966 in Chesterton, Indiana) is an American stand-up comic. His comedy routines often include him doing the voice of a supposed audience member commenting on his performance. He is also known for making fun of Hot Pockets, usually likening them to "a Pop-Tart filled with nasty meat." He often begins his routines with, "Don't worry, I've never heard of me either." Gaffigan first began performing stand up comedy on January 27, 1991 in New York City.

Read more about Jim Gaffigan on Last.fm.


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Jim Gaffigan