Contingent Fee Lyrics

Just keep your hands off it, my glorious profit
Contingent fee will always be mine, all mine
Come to us when tragedy strikes
For pain and suffering endured (mental anguish, too)
We will sue them for a small price
Unless they're broke and uninsured
Ding, dong, ding...I can hear the ambulance wail
Ding, dong, ding...Oh, my third is nifty
Appeal gets me fifty
Our percentage comes off the top
And as we calculate the fee (counting more for me)
From your share we pay all the costs...
Photocopies don't come free
Oh, how I just hate that hourly rate
Contingent fees mean soon I'll retire forever
Contingent fee, oh won’t you be...
Be my fee...my contingent fee

Lyrics Submitted by Gregory B Acedo