Masochist Lyrics

This is a place I know too well
Been down here a while, if you can't tell
And I have analysed and tried my best to justifyThe sorrow I have brought upon myselfAm I addicted to the misery, is this how I'll always be?
Grinding the salt into every wound?
Am I in love with all my ailments, glutton for punishment?
You can't trust me to be there for youI thought I had this, I thought I had this all figured out
You'd think I'd learned from all the shit I fucking screamed about
When there was sun I couldn't see for the clouds
Still climbing the walls of this well just to dive back downUntil I reached my rock bottom
Down to the marrow, bringing up the bad blood I'd forgotten
Is it that's making me sick?
Been burning both ends of the wick
Am I addicted to the misery, is this how I'll always be?
Grinding the salt into every wound?
Am I in love with all my ailments, glutton for punishment?
You can't trust me to be there for youI've got this cold black silhouette hanging like a marionette
Casting a shadow, a shade over me
Just a sick, sad, sorry mess, living like a masochist

Your worst impressions were right about me(Your worst impressions were right about me)
(Your worst impressions were right)I could ask you to stay, if you're feeling forgiving
I could live with the guilt, if you call this living
I could try to memorize each grain of sand
As it slips through my fingers, and falls from my handsIt took me longer than I'd care to admit
This life is only what I choose to make of it
And the only thing standing in-between happiness and myself
Was this depression I held so close to my chest
Am I addicted to the misery, is this how I'll always be?
Grinding the salt into every wound?
Am I in love with all my ailments, glutton for punishment?
You can't trust me to be there for youI've got this cold black silhouette hanging like a marionette
Casting a shadow, a shade over me
Just a sick, sad, sorry mess, living like a masochist
Your worst impressions were right about meWasting a waning youth
Waiting for something to help me pull through
I never saw the sun through the clouds
I lost faith when the skies were falling down