Mr. Bad Example Lyrics

I started as an alter boy, working at the church
Learning all my holy moves and doing some research
Which led me to a cash box, labeled 'Children's Fund'
I'd leave the change and tuck the bills inside my cummerbundI got a part-time job at my father's carpet store
Laying tackless stripping and housewives by the score
I loaded up their furniture and took it to Spokane
And auctioned off every last Naugahyde divanI'm very well acquainted with the seven deadly sins
I keep a busy schedule trying to fit them in
I'm proud to be a glutton and I don't have time for sloth
I'm greedy and I'm angry and I don't care who I crossI'm Mr. Bad Example, intruder in the dirt
I like to have a good time and I don't care who gets hurt
I'm Mr. Bad Example, take a look at me
I'll live to be a hundred and go down in infamyOf course, I went to law school and took a law degree
And counseled all my clients to plead insanity
Then worked in hair replacement, swindling the bald
Where very few are chosen and fewer still are calledThen on to Monte Carlo to play chemin de fer
I threw away the fortune I made transplanting hair
I put my last few francs down on a prostitute

Who took me up to her room to perform the flag saluteWhereupon I stole her passport and her wig
And headed for the airport and the midnight flight, you dig?
And fourteen hours later I was down in Adelaide
Looking through the want ads sipping Fosters in the shadeI opened up an agency somewhere down the line
To hire Aboriginals to work the opal mines
But I attached their wages and took a whopping cut
And whisked away their workman's comp and pauperized the lotI'm Mr. Bad Example, intruder in the dirt
I like to have a good time and I don't care who gets hurt
I'm Mr. Bad Example, take a look at me
I'll live to be a hundred and go down in infamyI bought a first class ticket on Malaysian Air
And landed in Sri Lanka none the worse for wear
I'm thinking of retiring from all my dirty deals
I'll see you in the next life, wake me up for meals