I am back, this time, Im the big surprise
And Im hiding behind your sofa
Im the culture shock, temporary block
And Ill love you for the next five minutesIm your magazine, cos you read me clean
Without taking any time for pictures
Im your hand grenade and your lemonade
Cos Ill blow up and leave you souredFind somebody with a working car
And drive them crazy, too
The big surprise is meI worked extra hard to pick your birthday card
You just threw it out and kept my money
I got up at six to make your favorite dish
So I sank when you said, you werent hungryFiled your tax return, let some candles burn
Played Mozart, to make your plants grow
Then I clipped the trees, got down on my knees
Not to work, just to pray, youd see meFind somebody who will paint your house
And gloss them over, too