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Baby - Stephen Lynch



     
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Baby Lyrics


This is for my little girl
My lady gives birth today
I run to her room right away
She smiles with glee and hands her to me
I look at my newborn and say
Damn that's an ugly baby
Damn that's an ugly ass baby
I'm feeling quite concerned
My semen must have turned
'Cause damn that's an ugly baby
I can't believe this came from me
I think her mom did too much LSD
she's skinny like a twig
at least her nuts are big
but the placenta is cuter than she
Damn that's an ugly baby
God damn that's an ugly ass baby
I can't take her home today

She'll scare the dog away
'cause damn that's an ugly baby
And when she smiles I find
Shane McGowen comes to mind
It makes me want to cry
When I look into her good eye
I always wanted kids
Is it wrong to hope for SIDS?
Then the doctor calls me in
Mr. Lynch she has a twin
Damn that's a good-lookin' baby
One for two on the good lookin' babies
I almost start to weep
Now this one we can keep
cause that was an ugly ass baby
Damn that's an ugly baby (x4)
She's got one good tooth and one ear and one eye
And thank god just one nose but it's on her left thigh
Now doctor I am asking you guy to guy
Would a really really really late term abortion apply
Oh no, I don't want no ugly baby
I said damn that's an ugly ass baby

Enjoy the lyrics !!!
Stephen Lynch is an American singer and comedian, famous for his raunchy comic lyrics. He was born July 28, 1971 in Abington, Pennsylvania, but grew up in Saginaw, Michigan and attended Western Michigan University, where he learned to play guitar. He is a Tony nominee for his role as Robbie Hart in the Broadway musical, The Wedding Singer. Stephen married Erin Dwight in September of 2003.

Lynch has produced eight albums:
Live At XM Studios (Live concert available only on the XM Comedy channel, no CD release planned)
The Craig Machine
Live at the El Rey (DVD)
Superhero
A Little Bit Special
Half A Man (Lynch's original demo tape; currently out of print)
3 Balloons
Lion

And one Broadway cast album:
The Wedding Singer, Original Broadway Cast Recording

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Stephen Lynch