My Whole Family... Lyrics

Everytime I go to dinner
Seems like I'm gettin' a little bit thinner
I'll sit down at the breakfast table
I can talk; well, they're not able
When I look at them, I find
There's a single question on their mind.
I wish it could go back to the way it was
It's not easy now becaaaauuuusseee.....
My whole family thinks I'm gay
I guess it's always been that way
Maybe it's 'cause of the way that I walk
Makes them think I like..... boys....
That I like booooooyyyyysss....
The goddamn question just won't go away
And I get asked every single day
But the way they ask it is not a disguise

Like, "How was your day? Do you like to kiss guys?"
This is the worst, maybe this was my fear
Now their opinions are crystal cleeeeeeaarrrrr...
My whole family now is shocked
I'm in the closet and the door is locked
Now my glory days are gone
I was John Elway, now I'm Elton John
My whole family now suspects
Watching Spongebob has side-effects
I'm not gay and that's what I said
If I'm gay, Hey God! Strike me dead! (Yanno? -laugh-)
(-coughing- That's weird...)
Just 'cause I go to an all guys school
Doesn't mean Justin Timberlake makes me drool
When I go outside, what do I see?
That the clouds in the sky spell F-A-G
Because...
I think that God might think I'm gay
What does he know anyway?
My grandma gave me a present just last year
And the card said "Happy Birthday, queer"
My whole family thnks I'm fab
"There's a guy's butt. Hey, Bo, take a stab."
'Why doesn't he get women? There's no other way!"
It's 'cause I'm lanky, not 'cause I'm gay, all right?
Not 'cause I'm gaaaaaayyy...
Just 'cause I'm afraid of the snow
Or my favorite color is.... the rainbow (-laugh- Just joking)
I don't mean to yell, but I fear I must
'Cause I'm losing the people I thought I could truuuuuuust
Even my boyfriend thinks I'm gay........Just Kidding
You all probably think I'm gay
Man, this song is counterproductive
La la la la la im not gay i swear
My whole family thinks I'm gay
What do they know anyway?
You gotta look right through the haze
Easy Bake Oven was just a phase
My whole family thinks I'm queer
That is all I ever hear
But I've been as straight as a ram
If you don't count Bible Camp
Dont count Bible Caaaaaaamp
I'm not gay, I sweaaaaaarrrr.....
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