Poor Unfortunate Souls Lyrics

I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me kinda strange
But you'll find that nowadays
I've mended all my ways Repented, seen the light, and made a change
And I fortunately know a little secret
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And dear lady, please don't laugh I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely, and depressed (pathetic)
CHORUS
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain
In need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them?
Yes, indeed!
Those poor unfortunate souls

So sad
So true
They come flocking to me crying
Will you help us, pretty please?"
And I help them!
Yes I do!
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore!
Yes on land it's much preferred
for ladies not to say a word
And after all dear, what is idle prattle for?
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On ladies who withdrawn
It's she who holds her tongue who gets a man
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Lyrics submitted by renecia.